Amelia (Gilman) & Brett Clairmont

October 17, 2009 at the Round Church and West Monitor Barn, Richmond, Vermont

How we met

If you had asked me if I knew right away that Brett was going to be my husband, I would have said no. He wasn’t my type: tall, blonde hair, blue eyes. Brett was average height, light brown hair, and hazel eyes. My brother-in-law, Mark, spent 15 minutes trying to locate him because he was so adamant that I meet this guy.

We met, shook hands, exchanged small talk, and I walked away.

Where I met Brett isn’t your usual meeting place for a social introduction. I met Brett at Camp Johnson where he was going through pre-mobilization for his deployment with Mark to Iraq.

Like Mark, Brett was leaving early, 3 weeks ahead of the rest of the platoon to get ready for their arrival at Camp Shelby.
It didn’t strike me at the time, but he had a quiet confidence about him that spoke volumes. When I saw Brett again at the Military sendoff on January 4, 2005, I approached him, gave him a hug, and thanked him for his service to this country. Since he was surrounded by his family at the time, I knew his attention was in high demand, so I quickly walked away to find Mark.

This brief encounter was the only personal interaction Brett and I had before his deployment.

In the next month that followed, my brother-in-law spoke to me about Brett and had asked me to send him some type of care package. His excuse was that he felt bad for the guy, and that he only got mail from his mother. I explained to Mark that I would do it, but was doing it to be friendly and supportive for one of his friends. Mark said it was just a morale booster and would brighten Brett’s day. It just so happened to be February when I put together a care package. I made some brownies, put in some gourmet cookies, found a couple guy magazines and sent them to Brett.

By the time I had gotten all of this ready for Brett, I had received an e-mail from him. My brother-in-law had given him my e-mail address. The link between Brett and I was Mark. He was determined to get us talking. I e-mailed back, small chat, but it was good small chat. It sparked my interest.

Then something happened that changed both of our lives. We lost a good friend to both of us, in combat in Iraq, 1st Lt. Mark Dooley.

He was Brett’s platoon leader and best friends with my brother-in-law Mark. I had known Dooley for about 2 years and just like everyone else who knew him was easily caught up with his love of life and adventurous behavior. Brett and I started e-mailing more frequently. The e-mails lead to our first phone call. I remember being so nervous. I don’t remember why I was so nervous, but I had those butterflies in my stomach. At the time I was working the night shift at Dartmouth Hitchcock. Brett and I had coordinated with e-mails for this phone call to take place. It was 2:00 A.M. here, but that was my break time. I had a one hour break and we talked for the whole hour. The sound of his voice on the phone was comforting and the moment we started talking, neither one of us wanted to let the other one go. All day I had worried if we would have enough to talk about, but in the end, the conversation came easy. Through all loss and sadness came a smile across my face again.

Only 6 weeks later, as I was preparing for the night shift, a phone call came that changed the way I lived my life.
I was leaving a message on someone’s voicemail when the phone rang. I stopped midstream on the message I was leaving; I had lost my breath, and I knew something was wrong. I then hung up my cell phone and listened to the sadness and disbelief of my father’s voice talking to my sister. I heard him say “No, No, No.” My heart broke in two again. 2nd Lt. Mark Procopio, my brother-in-law, had been killed by an IED. I spoke briefly to my sister on the phone, and then I went to get my mother who was at work.

The next few weeks were some of the hardest weeks of my life. I don’t know if I would have made it through them if it hadn’t been for Brett. He e-mailed me almost every day; he called me when he could, and he was there for me to lean on. This was when I fell in love with him. Despite the loss he had suffered of two close friends, he put me ahead of his own pain and suffering. He listened to my heartaches in the e-mails and called on the days he knew would be difficult for me to get through.

I was falling in love with someone I had never even eaten a meal with. We had never seen a movie or gone out on a date, but I found myself wishing he were there.

When Brett came home on leave in March we finally made our relationship official. We went out for a St. Patrick’s Day celebration and the rest was history. Brett’s deployment was done in June of 2006 and finally we were able to have a somewhat normal beginning to a relationship. The only problem was that I lived 2 hours away. Brett was awesome, and on his weekends off made the drive down to the farm to see me. For the next year and a half, we spent a lot of time on the phone.

I think that I knew before Brett did that we would end up together. I remember saying to Mark Dooley’s mom when she asked me about my relationship with Brett, “If he survives this deployment, we will probably get married.” I don’t know where the certainty came from for me to make such a statement, but somehow I knew it would work out if God allowed me the chance to be with Brett.

There are always things that change how one looks at life. The past year of Brett’s and my life has been no exception. In January 2009, Brett’s father Robert Clairmont was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Bob bravely lost his fight to cancer May 2, 2009. The tables turned and it was me who was there for Brett.

I tried to be strong for him so that he had someone to lean on, like he had been there for me.

Only he can tell you the pain of losing a parent, but I felt like Bob was a father to me. In the short time that I knew Bob, he always made me feel welcome with his quiet confidence. Bob was an amazing husband, father and friend. When I look at Brett I see so much of his father in him, especially when I look back to the first time I met him at Camp Johnson.

The Proposal:

In early May of 2009 I graduated from nursing school and got a job right out of school. For my graduation present, Brett got us amazing tickets to go and see George Strait for the last weekend of May. He had originally planned on asking me during the concert but I beat him to the punch. Brett had found a BMW motorcycle for me, and as I had always wanted one and promised myself I would buy one as a graduation present to myself, Brett bought it for me.

In one of our many discussions about getting married or when would be the perfect time, Brett brought up a valid point despite the fact he was being sarcastic. I believe his exact words were, “Well the money that I would have spent on a ring is tied up right now in a motorcycle that a certain someone just had to have. But that has two rings on it that can take you places, what more could a girl want?” At the time I laughed and agreed with him but it got me thinking. I called my sister the next day and asked her what she thought if I were to have my grandfather’s diamond ring reset into something for me.

She said lets go to Lippas! I took my grandfather’s ring down to Lippas and looked at all the amazing rings they had. I found the setting I had first picked out a year ago when I had shown Brett the kind of ring I wanted.

They were awesome. They helped me to pick out the perfect setting for my stone and kept it within my budget.

When they called me to tell me the ring was ready, I was home with Brett. I made up some story about having forgotten something at the store and that I would pick up something for dinner.

When I got home from picking up the ring, I brought in Chinese food and had the ring in my purse. We finally sat down to eat and I just couldn’t wait anymore.

I took the ring out and set it in front of Brett. I asked him, “Can this go along with my BMW?” He pulled the ring out and smiled. He looked at the ring, then got down on one knee and asked me to marry him.

Of course I said yes. The George Strait concert was amazing and an awesome way to celebrate our engagement!

There are times when Brett and I are both so stubborn that if feels like this relationship will never work and planning for this wedding was no exception.

When I was looking at the calendar for when I wanted to get married, I thought I wanted the numbers to be meaningful. So one day while talking to my sister about a possible date she brought me back to reality again.

She was being deployed to Afghanistan, and if I wanted her in my wedding it would have to be before she left or after she got back.

Brett and I were engaged the end of May 2009, and this conversation took place in the beginning of June 2009. I frantically started looking at which weekends had a 17 in them. August was too soon, and December was out of the question. October 17, 2009 was only a few months away. I looked at my sister and she looked firmly at me and said, “You don’t start your job at the hospital until the middle of July that gives you 6 weeks from right now to plan your wedding; I suggest you make this your summer job.”

The planning began just as soon as I got the okay from Brett. We had decided on pies and pumpkin cheesecake for dessert instead of traditional cake. In between meetings with vendors, my friend Beth and I baked all summer and froze the pies and cheesecakes that we would have the caterer finish off on the day of the wedding.

Once I had it in my mind what I wanted, the rest came rather easy.

The vendors whom we worked with made the evening one that our friends still talk about. We had the reception at the West Monitor Barn in Richmond. Their coordinator was amazing and made sure everything was ready. They worked hand in hand with the caterer, the DJ and the bartender. The worst thing that happened during our reception is that we forgot to label the wedding party’s table so we were bumped from our seats and did a mad dash to stir up the table in a good spot.

Joe and Linda of RaidenShine Photography were also amazing and helped to capture the entire day as it happened. They captured little things I hadn’t even pictured and am truly grateful for their attention to detail! They even took the time to get a portrait of me with my dog. Our wedding album is a true reflection of our day that we will cherish forever.

The day was a memorable one for sure. There were those who were deeply missed, but were there in spirit.

The West Monitor Barn was the perfect venue for us as it was comfortable and rustic with a true New England flair; it was a day full of emotion, smiles, tears, dancing, singing, and socializing.

We couldn’t have done it without the help of our families and close friends. It was everything I hoped for and a beautiful beginning to our lives together.

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Featured Vermont Bride Magazine wedding professionals:

DJ:  SuperSounds DJ Co. | 802-899-2823www.supersounds.com | Underhill, VT

Photographer: RaidenShine Photography, LLC | 802-598-9186 www.raidenshine.com | Burlington, VT

Flowers: Crimson Poppy Flower Shoppe | 802-434-5143 Richmond, VT e-mail: crimsonpoppy@myfairpoint.net

Reception: West Monitor Barn | 802-434-3969 www.monitorbarn.org | Richmond, VT

Ceremony: Round Church, Richmond, VT

Additional wedding professionals:

Cake:  Bride and best friend made all the apple pies throughout the summer and froze them; caterer then baked the pies. Jill Gilman, mother of the bride, made pumpkin cheesecakes.

Catering including table lines and dinnerware:  Bridge Street Cafe, Richmond

Dresses:  Fiori Bridal

Rehearsal:  Bridge Street Cafe, Richmond, VT

Rings: Lippa’s Jewelers, Burlington, VT

Table decor, gourds, pumpkins, mums:  Conant Farm, Richmond, VT. Additional decor provided by mother of the bride, Jill Gilman.

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