Debra (Vogl) and Matthew Burleigh

July 16, 2010 | Northern Lights, Lake Champlain Cruises, Burlington, VT

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There was no trying to meet expectations, no pressures, only doing what we love to do, and doing it together.

The Beginning:

It’s surprising we hadn’t met years before considering we both competed in triathlons and running events. However, we finally crossed paths just before the Vermont City Marathon in 2007 and hardly a day has gone by that we haven’t spent together. It was a great experience to run half of the marathon while he ran the whole thing, wondering the whole way if I would spot my new interest and who would pass who. Unfortunately, I didn’t see him during the race, but little did I know this would be the start of an entirely new lifelong journey for the two of us.

We knew right away that there was something special between us.

There was no trying to meet expectations, no pressures, only doing what we love to do, and doing it together. We came from similar family backgrounds, had similar athletic, healthy, active lifestyles, and both were looking for a serious, long term relationship, while enjoying the events of today.

That first summer was filled with fun dates including running, swimming, hiking, biking, and camping in the Adirondacks, great times with family and friends, and spending time with his dog Baileys.

In December, the poor economy hit us personally and Matt’s employer announced they would be shutting down the local site and offered for him to relocate to Raleigh, North Carolina. We had a tough decision to face, but after much thought and discussion, we had the confidence that our relationship would be worth taking the risk to give it a go and make a new life for ourselves in this new location. I left my corporate job, sold my condo, and in May 2008 we moved into our new home. By chance, I ended up being offered a position as a horseback riding instructor and special programs manager at a horse farm in Raleigh, so not only was this a new chapter in our relationship, but also an opportunity for me to pursue a passion that I would not have done without Matt’s support. Six months later we were devastated when the next round of news came along. This time, his company was closing all U.S. operations and there was no option to relocate.

We were faced with another tough decision, and during the economic recession. As much as we enjoyed our new home, friends, and jobs in Raleigh, we both agreed that Vermont is our ‘home.’ The proximity to family and friends, the outdoor opportunities, the snow covered mountains, and general lifestyle made the decision for us. By the end of December, our short North Carolina residency was over, and we were happy to be back in Vermont.

The Engagement:

I had moved twice and given up two jobs for the benefit of our relationship, so we had many discussions about our future and the possibility of marriage. It wasn’t so much a question of if, but when. As much as I thought about it, somehow I never saw it coming. Matt had already moved up to Vermont while I was finishing up my job in North Carolina, so it was a great reunion when I arrived to a snowy Vermont on December 21. The day after I arrived, Matt suggested we have dinner with my parents. Little did I know he had taken my dad aside to the workshop to ask for his blessing to marry me. My father was happy to give away his youngest child to this fine young man. After all, look at what we’d been through!

The next day, Matt had a perfect evening planned including cross-country skiing, our favorite dinner at Tiny Thai, and then a walk on Church Street with our dog. It was a typical frigid night, but the beautiful lights on Church Street and being with Matt again made up for the cold. When we got to the huge Christmas tree at the top of Church Street, we took some photos and Matt casually asked me if I thought the relationship was going well. I said yes, of course, and next thing you know, Matt was down on one knee asking if I’d marry him.

At this point, we were couch hopping between family and friend’s houses while trying to settle our affairs in Raleigh.

Although Matt had started a new job, I was without a job, and having a hard time even getting an interview. I was always one to take care of myself and have a solid job and a plan to move forward, so I had a very hard time dealing with the situation. In a time of such uncertainty, the engagement gave me hope that even though times were tough now, we would make it through together. I am so thankful to be happily employed today, and to say we are both in a better place in so many aspects of life than before we moved.

In celebration of our new life together, we decided to take our athletic pursuits to a new high, together. One week after the wedding, when most newlywed couples are on their tropical honeymoon, we completed an Ironman Triathlon, crossing the finish hand in hand. The intense training over the past year (while also planning a wedding) and amazing sense of accomplishment doing the race together has strengthened our bond and set us up for a lifetime of sharing goals and accomplishments.

Wedding Planning

An exciting new aspect of our lives together is that we started attending a new church together early in 2009. From our first visit, we felt the Essex Alliance Church was our new ‘home.’ That made the church an easy decision, and the pastor we chose was Matt’s manager from a prior job. We were also excited that our pastor was more than willing to include Matt’s father, a deacon, in the ceremony as well. Oddly enough, before exploring any reception venues, we both thought that having our reception on a cruise boat would be the right choice for us. Since we are very fond of Lake Champlain, and love the uniqueness of the venue, deciding on the Northern Lights was an easy choice. We had a raving review from a close friend to use RaidenShine Photography, and after meeting them the first time and seeing them work at a friend’s wedding, we knew they would take beautiful photos and be a joy to work with. I wanted to do what I could myself, so I made my bouquet and the grooms’ boutonnieres. Fiori Bridal definitely made the dress buying a wonderful experience. I never believed when people said you’d know when you found your dress, but I sure knew!

Most Memorable Details

Planning a wedding on a budget is really tough, but we were still able to work in several details that made the wedding ‘ours.’ We incorporated our dog into the engagement shoot since he wouldn’t be able to be a part of the wedding day. We included recipe cards in our invitations so we could put together a cookbook of our family and friends’ favorite recipes. At the rehearsal dinner, we had food from our favorite restaurant, Tiny Thai at the church’s reception hall and an ice cream sundae buffet for dessert. We asked a friend of the family if she and her woodwind trio would perform live music at our ceremony. I wore the necklace that one of my sister-in-laws wore for her wedding. We named the tables after our favorite races we had competed in during our relationship. We had the DJ play a song of Celtic bagpipes as we were announced at the reception so I could incorporate my dream of having bagpipers at my wedding. And my favorite, we had a homemade ‘finish line’ sign made that our best man and maid of honor held for us to run through when we were announced that said “Finish

One Chapter – Start A Life Together.” I was able to incorporate our athletics in a way that didn’t ruin my dress!

I also will never forget the weather we experienced on our day. I just about cried that morning when a heavy rain storm blew through as we were getting dressed and ready. My dream of photos outside with the mountains in the background was dashed, but it was more than made up for when we left the church to the sun peaking out and the weather only got nicer throughout the evening. We were so blessed to have such a beautiful sunset with vibrant colors for everyone to admire from our cruise boat. Even though it rained on my wedding day, the day turned out just perfect!

Planning Advice to Brides

Take your time in your wedding planning. There’s no need to have a quick engagement and a stressful time planning on such short notice.
When family and friends offer to help, take it. They really do want to help, and you will need it if you want to stay sane and enjoy the process.

Take advantage of a mentoring program through your church or with other successful married couples. You may think you’ve talked about everything and know each other well, but we now have a strong base to look to when things get tough.

Most importantly, don’t fret over the small details; you’ll forget about them on the day anyway. If something doesn’t pan out the way you had always dreamed, be open to new ideas and a plan B that may work out better than you every imagined! Remember, this is your wedding, and you do not have to do what your friends or the brides in the magazines do; this is your day.

Read our library of Vermont love stories online here.

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